It's finally the day. You wake up ready to rejuvenate your diet, your life!, for spring, willing to limit yourself to 2 net carbs a day, willing to start turning a slight tinge of orange from all the carrots you plan to eat, so as not to feel hungry and go grab the doritos.
You're going to do something about that winter five(teen?) pounds.
And then you read a facebook newsfeed telling you that fat can burn fat and calories.
Yes, this fat is minimally active in adults. Yes, the spare tire and thigh-ers that you've built up are NOT the kind of fat that cannibalizes its brethren. Yes, probably the best way to activate it is turning down the heat, making yourself maximally uncomfortable for months at a time. Yes, just skimming the article would be enough to tell you not to count on this to help you, ever.
But you totally heard that scientists in, like, Scandinavia discovered that fat burns fat!
Your childish optimism is only slightly annoying. The delusion you're living your life under, the one that means your "lady" lumps now have no option but to stick around, creating bumps and folds that no beach-goer should have to spot through and around the edges of a bikini...well, those are FAR worse than puberty.
-Posted by Jilly
Thursday, April 9, 2009
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